How Frogs, Crawdads, and Soccer Changed My Perspective

Yesterday was a good day. Actually, the whole week was good. Scratch that — pretty much this whole month has been good.

I know what you’re thinking. “How could you say that? We’re right in the middle of one of the worst pandemics we’ve ever seen!”

And you’re not wrong. I’ve not been immune to the fears and concerns that others have faced. I’ve seen my company take drastic cost-saving measures and been worried about my job. I’ve heard of people only a couple degrees removed from me contracting this virus. I’ve wondered if I’m ever going to see another roll of toilet paper in my life, or if it’s finally time to just pull the trigger on that bidet. But nevertheless, this time has been pretty good for me.

Let me explain.

I’m a busy person. Not out of necessity, really, but because I enjoy being involved in things. I enjoy being a part of something. I love getting my hands dirty, and seeing progress, and seeing something where there was previously nothing. And I’m a pretty big extrovert, so I like being where the people are. I also genuinely love serving the Church. Also also I’m really bad at saying no to just about anything.

As a consequence of who I am, my calendar pretty much always looks like this:

Yikes

And since I’m not really proficient at keeping an accurate calendar, this doesn’t include all of the weekly routine things like Abby’s dance classes, Katie’s Bible study, or any of the extra things that come up like helping people move or fixing their cars or whatever. 

And while a lot of this busyness may feel admirable at the time, and may actually be in the service of some good deed, it’s all completely moot if my own family is being neglected in the process. And I’ve learned over these last couple of weeks that that is unfortunately something I have overlooked a lot in the past.

But as this virus has swept across the country and brought life as we know it to a screeching halt, my calendar has opened up quite a bit.

My home office has become my only office. Lunch every day with my friends has been replaced with lunch every day with my family. Dinner out at restaurants has turned into trying new recipes with my daughters. Wednesday evening church activities have turned into frog hunts out back.

And I’ve never been happier.

Yesterday I was doing some things around the house, putting away dishes, taking out the trash, And Abby asked me “Daddy, if you could spare the time, would you play soccer with me?” 

Okay first of all, who taught this kid to talk like this? I’m a writer and I’m barely even proficient with the English language. Much less as eloquently spoken as she is.

But also, if that's not just a punch right in the gut...

Just wait, there’s more.

We spent a good majority of the day together outside. We went hunting for crawdads, we caught a frog, we followed some deer tracks through a field for a while, and we played soccer in the backyard longer than any actual match has ever gone (turns out I’m actually in pretty good shape. Lookout, Messi).

And then we came inside for dinner and Abby told Katie “This has been the best day of my life!”

Simultaneously the sweetest and most painful thing I’ve ever heard in my life.

My 7-year old daughter, who has been to some cool places, done some cool things, and has had a pretty good life so far, defines the “best day of [her] life” as spending the day playing with her daddy. Now I’m no idiot, I know my child is as in-touch with hyperbole as I am, and I know kids can be pretty short-sighted. But the day clearly impacted her.

It impacted me, too.

It reminded me that those extra minutes or hours spent in any number of fleeting pursuits are often not seen, thought about, or remembered for more than a passing moment, but that same time invested in my kids, gives birth to their “best day ever.”

Now I know I’m nothing new. You’ve heard this same old song a million times. And deep down we all know it’s true. Spending time with your family is obviously more important than spending extra time at work. 

But look past the cliche advice for a moment, and let this be an encouragement to you.

As COVID continues to disrupt normal life for the foreseeable future, take some time to think about your priorities. Now that life is on pause and you can focus on the things that really, really matter, consider what things you can trim away as life returns back to normal. 

Your family wants you.

Your family needs you.

That extra conference call doesn’t.